Your mind makes all the difference.

Someone asked me yesterday if I truly believed that some people are just more prone to depression and anxiety.

I said, “no. I believe, for most of us, it’s always a choice.”

That’s right. I believe most of us, no matter who we are or what we have experienced, have the power to choose how much we experience anxiety and depression. We have the power to use our mind and it makes all the difference to how we feel.

This opinion is not going to be popular. I already know it. The common belief is that people suffer from symptoms or diagnoses beyond their control. They just got bad luck. They are the unfortunate ones.

This is the narrative that currently dominates popular culture so it’s hard to have a different opinion without seeming insensitive or out of touch.

But what if that wasn’t true? What if all the people struggling had the power to change their lives? What if there was an alternative reality that was actually MORE REAL?

It is my belief that it’s possible. And I’ve formed that opinion from tens of thousands of hours spent at spiritual retreats and personal development courses, from reading books and studying research for my master’s degree in change and from my own therapy sessions and coaching others through their transformations.

I believe all human beings struggle with depressing and anxious thoughts and most of us have the power to manage this without medication or feeling like it’s a “lifetime sentence” of bad luck.

It took me a while to believe and accept this, myself, so I understand why people will disagree with me or think I “just don’t understand them” because I once said the same thing. I went through

Depression feels incredibly scary and isolating. It feels personal. It feels unique. We can feel like the world is happy and carefree and we’re the only ones who are suffering and struggling.

Anxiety feels like a swirling whirlpool of trauma and fear and no control over what’s happening to us. It affects our breathing and makes us feel small and insignificant and maybe even broken.

This is how I know: because I’ve been depressed. I feel anxious very often. I have had dark, dark thoughts. I’ve come close to wanting to remove myself from the planet.

I know how it feels and I also know what it’s like to use tools to pull myself out and through to the other side.